What does a lady who just turned 20 want to express?
On Gratitude
Perhaps I express gratitude to Facebook because even if we say that people who actually remember our birthdays without it are the sweetest,we can't deny the fact that people who take time to post on our timelines or send us messages because of a reminder that it's our birthday are also sweet. And of course, I am most thankful to all those people who did. <3
So why am I thanking Facebook again? Because it has made reaching out to each other so accessible to the point that one celebrant like me can be overwhelmed and touched by people's numerous greetings.
On a Normal day
Yesterday, I was in between happy and okay. I was not the happiest but neither was I the saddest. I spent my birthday with a normal day, with my normal routines. I have even forgotten to eat my breakfast and I ate Anne's best birthday cake in the world (with one or two Makis) as my lunch. I prepared for and actually executed a teaching demo in church last night and arrived home past 9 pm when everyone but me has eaten dinner. Wohoo! What a great birthday celebration! Haha!
But I arrived at home with the cute little boy greeting me the very moment I entered our house. And he actually blew my candle for me. I also had an unexpected "mini-handaan" with my family and I just didn't expect that.
About gifts
Material gifts? I received none. Not even one except the picture greetings which I received from my Sunday School family last Sunday. But I honestly did not seek for any. For greetings (since words of affirmation is my love language) were enough or more than enough and I can never feel even more content in the life that I have now.
In Looking Back
My 19th year has been a tough roller-coaster ride. I had numerous blissful-happiest and heart-breaking-shattering moments. There were days I was way up high on cloud nine, days when I felt like the most beautiful lady on Earth or the most loved creature in the entire universe. But there were even more times (longer, actually) when I felt lower than my lowest and uglier than whoever or whatever could be ugliest.
True. That's how it looks like when I look back. But the latter days of my 19th year when I crawl to get on with life and move along despite the circumstances are the days that brought me back to the life He has set out for me. Times at my lowest and my feelings of being the ugliest are ironically what lifted me and instilled again the beauty I seemed to have lost.
These days before I turn twenty are the highlights of His grace and steadfast love compelling me to move forward, even through one step a day, despite the current of yesterday pulling and weighing me down.
The Promise
Every detail of my 19 years of living, He has perfectly willed and planned. And yesterday morning when I talked to Him, he reminded me of how He is there, beyond my 20th year, and He has prepared a work for me, the man He has for me and more than ever a grandiose life plan I can never imagine for myself today.
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