Sunday, January 20, 2013

Not Because SHE asked


It’s not her birthday. But maybe it’s because her new profile picture is the first one I saw in my news feed. (:D) It’s not because SHE asked me to do this (SHE no longer wants me to) yet I chose to do this.
SHE said that SHE didn’t want promises made to be broken. And people said a gift that has been asked spoils the act of giving. However, I say, the promise (of making a blog about her) is not broken (just delayed for a while by the one who made it :D) and in a few minutes (or hours) it would be fulfilled. And I say, a gift that is chosen to be given when no longer asked is a splendid, heart-felt gift.

The SHE and her I’m talking about, I can define with the best 10 snippets that I have known about HER after almost 2 years of being her favorite sister. :DD (I don’t know the risk I’m taking as I tell the world this truth, but the truth, I believe, will set our other sisters free!)


10. FOR HER TO BE FEATURED IN A “WORST OUTFIT” ARTICLE IS AN IMPOSSIBILITY.
            SHE is the fashion guru in class, the best costume department head that any play production could ever have and the head-turner “fashionista” wherever she goes. I’m still waiting for her fashion blog and I think I’ll be one of her numerous readers in the future. J           

9. SHE COULD LOOK INTIMADATING BUT I’LL TELL YOU THE CONTRARY
            Truth be told, I was intimidated the first time I met her. Maybe it was my “fragile personality” that made me feel that way, or it’s really everyone’s first impression about her. But ladies and gentlemen readers, I tell you, SHE is far from intimidating. SHE doesn’t brag when SHE has millions of reasons to. SHE doesn’t make one feel inferior when SHE is really larger, grander than the usual down-to-earth, easy-to-be-with friend that we know SHE is.

8.  TALK ABOUT OUR SIMILARITIES:
            I am ecstatic that I suddenly realized we have a lot of things in common!
LEARNING STYLE: SHE is a visual learner and sometimes field-dependent (but not even half of my field dependency I think)
REFLECTIVE: We are battling for the MOST REFLECTIVE AWARD in class. One way SHE proves herself worthy of the award is when she finishes last in an exam, or when SHE internalizes her report.
RARELY RECITES IN CLASS: Of the 40 hands inside the classroom, ours are the two pairs that are rarely raised.
RESERVED TYPE: I can tell that SHE is the reserved-type whenever we’re outside or with people we don’t know. SHE would be quiet and be annoyed with our classmates if they’re making loud noise.  And I think SHE also reserves her most serious and intimate talks to people closest to her heart.
BEAUTIFUL MASTERPIECE: We are sisters, we look like each other because we’re both God’s beautiful masterpiece.
           
7. TALK ABOUT OUR DIFFERENCES:
MY EVERYDAY DIALOGUE IS “Ate bigyan/hawaan mo naman ako ng kasipagan mo!” Sometimes I think I am industrious and responsible but whenever I hear what SHE has accomplished, it makes me think again.
K-POP ENTHUSIAST: SHE loves Korean artists, movies, tv shows, songs, food and all other Korean stuff probably. I will not forget that instance SHE told me that it occurred once that SHE only had Korean songs in her phone.
KIND OF TECHY SAVVY: This is related to her being a K-POP fan. I can say that SHE is kind of techy savvy since SHE is the ultimate torrent download supplier of her co-K-POP enthusiast and believe it or not, my wife (it’s a long story), Debie, whose demand SHE could not outrun.
            CHOLERIC AND OUTSPOKEN: When it’s natural for me to follow, SHE’s a born leader. When it’s hard for me to express things, SHE has the strength and prowess to directly and clearly speak her mind.

6. CAPITAL S-H-E
            SHE is probably one of those who are unconsciously building the feminism beliefs in me. I used capital S-H-E to emphasize her strength and independence as a woman, a daughter, an Ate and a friend. SHE seldom cries, but then, I think those are the times that I would rather want to be seldom.

5. I LOVE IT WHEN SHE TALKS ABOUT HER FAMILY
            I really love hearing stories about her Mama and Papa and about her sisters who seem to be her BFFs. The beautiful family SHE has makes me think that fairy tale families are still possible even up to now.

4. AWAY FROM THE CAPITAL S-H-E
            Paulo Coehlo wrote in “The Alchemist”: “I’m a woman of the desert… But above all, I’m a woman.” And SHE too has a kryptonite. I think these are the people closest to her heart like friends, family or XY chromosomal creatures like… the code name in one of her status updates?! :DD

3. HER LOVE FOR THE ROYAL FAMILY, MG, and FRIENDSSSSSS
            I admire her so much for her generosity, care, thoughtfulness and LOOOVE for the people SHE treasures. SHE treats them like those with her own blood and it made me think that blood isn’t always thicker than water.

2. HER LOVE FOR GOD
            One of my cherished moments with her are those times when SHE talks to me about her conversations with and prayers to God. Usually SHE would have these lines: “sabi ko kay Lord..” or “sabi ko Looooooorrrrrdd” And I’m happy to hear and not only see about her love for Him. Happier even, for her new Bible, which was given to her by her sister last December as a birthday gift.

1. MY ATE LISA
            SHE doesn’t want me to call her Ate LISABEL or worse LISABEL alone. She is ATE LISA, my Ate Lisa. She’s my favorite Ate and I’m her favorite sister (though we told this to every other sister we have! Haha!) This MY ATE LISA from the perspective of her younger sister Abbie.
This is one of my favorite pictures of her :)

P.S.
I hope I killed you with the sweet words I wrote here. But wait, there’s more: I LOVE YOU ATE! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! *KISS* *HUG* :DDD


Proud to be the Fashion Queen's Sister :)

Frame Letter


To my future students,

I missed writing to all of you. Though I did it only once through blog and a couple of times for a project in one of my major subjects, it remains my desire to keep you in touch with what is happening to me as a student at present and as your English teacher in the future.
I hope you too are thrilled with the surprises that every new year has in store for us. This 2013, I know you may have a lot of plans, a lot of expectations for a great year ahead. It isn't wrong to make it a goal to have your new year's resolutions and promises fulfilled as early as the 20th page or first 3 weeks of our 2013 journey. Of course, success is what we aim for. However, my dear students, that is not always the case. As early as the start of the new year, success could be seemingly out of our reach.
I called my first week in school "a real tough week" wherein everyday never ran out of to-do's. But that's not the only thing that made it tough, because tougher than my raging school works was my raging heart. The battle within my heart was against a painful part of my past. These are moments when something you have out-rightly disowned and left behind starts shouting at you and demanding your attention. You may even wonder why you are disturbed and affected by its screams when you think that you have long forgotten it. And in reality my students, it could not end there. You too can crawl back, drawn to this past and give it the attention it demands. It is when you start moving backwards instead of moving forward.
To speak to you in a manner clearer to your understanding, moving backwards could mean cheating again when you promised you'll never do it again, hurting people when you asked forgiveness and told them you'll not hurt them again. Simply put, it is doing AGAIN the wrong things you've done in your past. And that is the very thing that happened to me my dear students. My year began with this struggle and I nearly lost the battle.
My battle with that was not yet over when another army of trial attacked me. My dear students, in my desire to be able to be a better, more knowledgeable and expert teacher for all of you, I aspired the Global Undergraduate Exchange Program. This is something you can read in my past entries. The result of whether or not I passed the interview was released this week. And the outcome was both good news and bad news. The good news is, I'll be teaching you sooner since I'll not graduate late, but the bad news is, I felt sad for myself and for our department. Every year, the English department has a representative accepted for the Global Ugrad. This time, they do not have one.
My dear students, could you feel the weight your English teacher felt for being so distant from success as early as January? I fret that you too might experience this and would not know what to do and how to respond to it. I would like to share within this letter I have for you, a letter God gave me (during one of my devotions, I asked Him to speak to me as I scribble whatever he led me to write in my journal). I already posted this but then, parts of this specific message can be altered to suit the painful, incomprehensible moments in your life that makes you think success and hope is too far.

                         "What happened to you is not something I planned to make you see how little you are--- a moment I planned to make you feel discouraged, worthless and a mess. I was in control even if you weren't. For every single thing that happened in the process--- be it fun, stressful, inspiring, saddening, I am Lord of it. Something beyond your understanding is what I'm doing in your life. And all you should hold on now is that very situation that cannot be understood by your mind, that could not be accepted and faced by your heart--- is something I willed--- the BEST I have for you regardless of how painful or unpleasant it is at the moment."

          If you experience failure or even feel like a failure as early as the first month or any week, day, hour and second of this year, remember, He is LORD of every single event. He is Lord of pleasant and unpleasant situations and He has a purpose for everything that happens in your life. Put in mind and trust that He truly has “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jer. 29:11) And this does not depend on the situation--- whether it looks good or bad to you. All good and bad: He turns them for your good.

                                                                     Hoping the letter within the letter helped you,
                                                                               Your Future English Teacher

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

20 Snippets 12 Words


Here are 20 snippets that would sum up my 2012: (I was expecting an excerpt but I unconsciously made a novel out of last year!)

20. Maturity of Heart

It was a year when I had a number of battles with heart issues caused by XY Chromosomal Creatures. I wouldn't say I've won every war right on, but I am certain that my heart was and is past the age of infancy, gradually making its way to maturity. :) Literally, it means I'm congratulating myself for learning to let reason reign over my emotions (little by little) and mastering the art of healthy refraining and ignoring.


19. Family Peace

The Peace within our family when gaps ended and relationships were restored is priceless. It was the best gift and miracle of 2012. I then understood why Miss Universe candidates wish for world peace that much. It's that priceless in a larger scale!

18. 3rd: Best Room Decor

I was at the brink of unleashing the multiple intelligences in me during the DVBS 2012 at COG Main. Who would have thought I could have drawn and decorated a room! Though we were spent: financially and physically, the joy that the 3rd in Best Room Decor brought the DVBS students made everything worth it!

17. The Unfamiliar

This was the supposed title of my entry about the National Youth Camp 2012. It was undone, but simply put, The Unfamiliar meant I was moved to abandon my comfort zone, towards the unfamiliar. I accepted the assignment of being a Facilitator though my heart was shouting NO from the beginning of its offer. . The yes I made gave a boost on my spiritual and personal growth. It was one of the best yeses I made in my entire life!

16. Fellowship

I’m grateful how the Lord orchestrated my 2012 to open a way for Ate Angie and I to have fellowship again. Our devotions in the dorm are one of my greatest sources of strength.  And I would never forget the time Ate Tin and Ate Mitzi (her friends) joined us.

15. 18th

My 18th birthday made it possible for me to have the laptop I prayerfully claimed that year. Only, it came in a smaller version: Psalmie, my netbook buddy. It was the birthday gift of my brother. I never felt I turned 18 (even up to now) but it’s a sure sign that my blessed life today simply makes me feel years younger and never older! :D

14. Melancholic-turned-Sanguine

This is not 100 % accurate all the time. But probably ½ of my 2012 is spent laughing and smiling mostly with my HC Family.

13. Global Ugrad

I repeat, it’s Global Undergraduate Exchange Program and NOT Fulbright Scholarship. Being recommended for it alone is a privilege. And for me, it’s His special way of affirming me. And the passport, NBI clearance, independence, stress, weariness, joy, confusion, trust, faith, and experience that I had because of it were all together blessings in different forms. :)

 12. Love Relationship

I realized how He, through every day of 2012, has moved me from religion to a love relationship with Him.

11. Out in the Open

My frailties, mess were brought to light---- to be dealt by God, myself or with others. Pride and insecurity are no longer secrets of my life.


10. LPs and Demos He orchestrated

Who would have been the source of ideas of a cramming LP maker right in the middle of the night or at dawn? Who would have helped a soft-spoken teacher-to-be modulate her voice? And who would have helped a perfectionist move on and go on after mistakes? It can’t be given credit to any other but Him.

9. Materially Blessed Too

New phone, new study table, new chair and new other things this 2012: I am materially blessed too!

8. New blogging Hub

This 2012 I also moved into my new blogging hub: Freed to Free @freedeemed.blogspot.com

7. All’s Well That Ends Well

The role of the nameless first sir had unveiled my acting prowess as a man. I would always treasure our 8:30-8:30 school days due to our play practices and our miraculous performance on the very day of the presentation. But then, I would always cringe at the sight of my picture with moustache and untied hair.

6. Honors Christ

Different tests came our way this 2012 and they were all necessary and vital to refining our being a class truly honouring Him.

5. No longer hidden

Who would have thought I could sing, play the guitar and dance in front of many people? Only the HC would have thought of that and they believed that I could. J

4. Dean’s Lister

Indeed, this was his favour and gift to an underserving student, daughter of His. He has sprinkled my grades with His grace and all glory belongs to Him.

3. Best Teacher Award

This award, I always believe He deserves. He’s the best teacher to stubborn students like me. However, in Sunday School, He again qualified an “unqualified me” for it.

2. You Alone in Action

It is possible that we say: You alone Lord, and unconsciously long for someone or something else. However, as my 2012 ended, He showed me how broken cisterns ceased to satisfy me, ceased to make me long for them. “You alone Lord” married my reality.

1. You

You are the snippet of my life the made up the whole, and YOU ARE THE SNIPPET THAT MADE MY 2012 WHOLE.


12 WORDS:
This year, what has kept me and everyone else is YOUR LOVE.

20 snippets. 12 words.
2012