THE FIGURES aren’t paramount

Waiting is a task wherein you do nothing, but ironically, it is one that is most tiring. Staring in oblivion for hours, waiting for a bus that will never seem to arrive--- it is a picture that’ll perfectly fit my “Most Dreaded Times Album”. I thought, probably, the very thing that makes it intolerable is the fact that you do nothing but wait. I wish I could use my phone and text then--- but I had no load, read --- but it was too dark, write--- but it was so absurd to write on the street. So the minutes, hours, dragged on in mere waiting.

                It was interesting on the other hand that I realized --- I missed this very “dreaded time”. It was my routine last school year – racing with passengers on a Friday which I don’t do especially these school days except last night.

                The loss of things we’ve grown accustomed to could sometimes make us ‘homesick’ about them. Then, I’m sure I have a lot to miss about our 1^st quarter that had just ended last August 11, 2011.

                First, I’ll be homesick of our 4 HOURS BREAK (M, T, and F). Usually, it’s our time to eat at either of the SMs – San Marcelino Karinderyas or SM Mall. It also had been my Office Warehouse or National Bookstore Time for my “repressed obsessions” with school supplies. And typical of students, it’s our time for supposed-to-be reviewing turned into chit-chat mode/ sleeping sessions in the library.

                Secondly, and most importantly, I’ll miss our two subjects: Foundations of Education and Child & Adolescent Learning.

                I’ll miss the ever-generous sharing of thoughts and insights in Ma’am Calapardo’s 4-5:30 pm class. (A professor that reminds me of our T.L.E Teacher in high school)

                And our last but equally racing class for generosity of sharing knowledge and ideas: Dr. Joven’s class. Though some buffering occurs in his class . . . . . . . his gentlest approach to students somehow outweighs it. In case you haven’t met him and of you’ll never meet him, you’ll be losing the chance to meet the KINDEST professor in the whole wide world of PNU. (Ask my classmates.)

                Aside from these things to be missed, God asked me to leave some things behind in the experimental first quarter that had just ended.

                Particularly, they have something to do with “THE Figures”.

                One instance, you may feel like throwing off a feast when you had the “highest score” in an exam. High grades, good grades --- they’re wonderful. But they’re not everything. One thing, don’t let them get into your head and another; don’t get boxed within these figures.

                They’re not the most significant thing in this world.  And there are also three things that these figures won’t mean:

                (1) You fulfilled your purpose in life with high grades.

                (2) You have truly learned and gained good study habits.

                (3) You have been productive.

                The things that God asked me to leave have something to do with these three:

                Focus, Balance, Feasibility – interchange the first letters for mnemonics: BFF. :D

                The sad thing is, we can become so focused about studies that our minds merely revolve around finishing this and that, reviewing this and that. God was making me realize - - - HE is the main topic of life and studies is a subtitle. Don’t interchange it.

                I am moved by the reminder that I may be using Him as a means to an end - - - praying for Him to enable me to finish my to-do-lists and never really have time to listen to His agenda for me.

                “Martha, Martha, you are so anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:41

                I could hear God saying “Abbie, Abbie, you are so anxious and troubled about many things…” and the very same thing He told Martha. And what was Mary doing you may ask:

                Mary was listening to Jesus. (v.39)

                I was being asked by God to have a clear cut FOCUS. My purpose? Love God, love people. (Luke 10:27) It only means I won’t be too busy studying that I have no time to help others.

                 Second is our God of Order asking me to leave my idle, slothful way of spending time during our break. You have read about the sneak peek of my used-to-be 4 HOURS break right? This second quarter, we’ll have one hour and thirty minutes break --- God wants me to optimize using it. You see, God isn’t merely concerned about things being in order. In Ecclesiastes 3, He desires we have a BALANCE for the distribution of our precious time. It’s because He knows our very tendencies to procrastination, laziness and cramming! When He desires balance, He desires us to have enough time for both rest and work. Delaying work has never done any good to any person that ever existed in this world ---- it was delaying gratification that always had!

                Lastly, is regarding FEASIBILITY. It is through our Prof Ed 1 Class (Foundations of Education) that I have come to realize, I’m very much of an idealistic person. I see myself tackling my whole life at once, planning to finish ALL that I had to do overnight. My to-do-lists never came to a completion. What I’m planning is always too idealistic. CONCRETE, FEASIBLE, ATTAINABLE plans, God tells me. I need to leave my unrealistic plans behind. Romans 12:2 and Philippians 4:8 are the two verses I’ll hold on to this.

                BALANCE, FOCUS, FEASIBILITY - my “BFF” for the Second quarter.

                The thing is ---- “THE Figures” aren’t paramount.